Anger Cuts Deeper
by Sokerchick
Summary: When a case hits Elliot hard will he let his emotions get the better of him? WIP.
1. Chapter 1

Title: Anger Cuts Deeper

Author: U2Soccerchick

Summary: Elliot's emotions are all over the place but will he allow his own judgment to get in the way of a case?

Rating: T

A/N and Warning: First and foremost I'd like to thank Valarie (BoredSVUnut) for the AWESOME beta. She's been a huge help through the whole process of creating my very first SVU fic. This story contains sensitive material about a self-inflicted form of body mutilation (self-injury) known as cutting. If you would like more information about it go to br

**Friday March 11, 200512:57 PM  
Trial Part 57  
New York Court Room **

"God Damnit." Elliot Stabler slammed his hand on the back of the bench in front of him as people began to exit the court room.

A reassuring hand rested on his shoulder as his partner stood up beside him. "It's fine Elliot. We'll get him next time. It was a technicality."

"We'll get him next time?" He was seething. "Next time Liv? After he rapes another little boy? Or three more? This is bullshit Olivia and you know it. He shouldn't have gotten off." His voice grew in volume as he allowed his anger to escalate.

"Elliot, I agree with you. It's crap but there isn't anything we can do about it right now."

Elliot ignored his partner and glared at the defendant. Michael Makowski had been accused of raping three boys all under eight years old.

All of the boys had testified but their recount of the details had been sketchy at best. Two of the boys had spent the entire time staring at their abuser while the third had broken down on the stand under the onslaught of the defense attorney. The final piece of information that had torpedoed the entire case was the testimony of the lab technician who had worked the case. There was evidence that some of the DNA samples had been mishandled.

His gaze shifted solemnly to the mother of the youngest boy who had been molested. She was sitting in her seat clutching a Kleenex and weeping wringing the tissue between her hands. "They're just kids Liv. They trusted us and thought they were going to be safe. That the guy who hurt them would be put behind bars and that they would be able to go back and play baseball and just be kids again. But that damn attorney made them sound like they were making it up. They're just kids damn it."

There was nothing Olivia could say to that. There was nothing to say because it was true. She settled for softly steering her partner out of the courtroom.

**Friday March 11, 2005  
2:00 PM  
SVU Squad Room**

A black cloud hung over Elliot's desk the rest of the day and everyone tried to steer clear of his anger. Finally in a huff Elliot stormed out of the squad room.

Fin looked askance at Olivia but the brunette shook her head. "Give him some time Fin. He's probably up on the roof."

Fin nodded in deference to her years of experience dealing with Elliot and turned back to his own work. A rape on the upper east side of Manhattan. Sometimes this job sucked.

Twenty minutes later Olivia decided to go in search of her errant partner. As she was walking out into the hallway she bumped head long into the object of her search.

"Liv. Sorry." He looked at her as he took a half step back freeing some space between their bodies. She could see the sorrow behind his eyes but anger no longer clouded the bright blue orbs. "Look I know I went off in the court room and I'm sorry."

"It's fine El. You Okay?" Concern filled every word.

"Yeah I just had to blow off some steam. Thanks, though." He moving around her as he spoke and entered the squad room. Slipping into his chair he removed a small black box from his pocket and slid it into the back of his desk drawer.

He looked up and met the liquid brown eyes of his partner and leaned back in his chair. "What's next?"


	2. Chapter 2

**Monday March 14, 2005  
9:20 AM  
SVU Squad Room**

"Okay people. We have a string of rapes that have all been connected together through DNA testing done by the lab. There's a twist with this one. The rapist has HIV. Dr. Warner sent us the results of the workup done on the sperm left on the vics and the HIV virus is definitely present."

Elliot felt the need to interrupt his Captain at this point. "So not only is this scum raping innocent girls but he's exposing them to HIV? A real charmer." The detective did nothing to hide the disgust in his voice.

Cragen ignored the comment and continued. "Benson, Stabler you two are leads on this one but you need any help you got it. We need to get this guy off of the street. He's already raped four girls we need to bring him in before he hurts anyone else. The attacks are all in or near Central Park and have all occurred between one o'clock and four o'clock in the morning. We don't have any witnesses so you'll have to ask victims what they remember."

"On it Cap." Elliot and Olivia grabbed their coats and headed out on the streets.

**Monday March 14, 2005  
10:15 AM  
Apartment of Katrina Meyer E. 56th and Lexington Avenue Apartment 4b**

Olivia walked boldly up to the door and knocked. She paused as she heard shuffling. "Ms. Meyer. It's Detective Olivia Benson. We talked on the phone and spoke about my partner and I coming over."

The sound of a lock turning was her only answer. A petit woman opened the door a crack as Olivia reached in her coat and pulled out her badge. "I'm Detective Benson. This is my partner Detective Stabler."

The door opened fully to let the two detectives into the small apartment. The nervous woman in front of them self-consciously smoothed her hooded sweatshirt and wrung her hands as she quickly gestured for the newcomers to sit on the small sofa.

She swiftly pulled her knees up into her chest and hugged them close. "You said you wanted to talk to me?"

"Yes Katrina." She looked askance at the use of the woman's first name and continued after she received a slight nod. "We wanted to know if there was anything else you remembered about the night that you were attacked in the park."

"Umm…" the young woman glanced nervously at Elliot who tried his hardest to look non-threatening. "Umm. I told the other people everything."

"I know you did but it would be better for us if you would be willing to help us out. We'd like to hear it directly from you so that you can help us catch the person who did this to you."

The woman clutched her knees closer to her chest and tucked a stray lock of raven hair behind her ear. "Umm. I had a bad day at work. I'm an Architect and I had this great design in the works but the company I was doing the preliminaries for changed their minds. They pulled their contract. I was frustrated and couldn't sleep so I went for a walk."

Olivia cut in. "At two in the morning?"

"I was stressed out OK!?" The woman now looked more like a frightened girl. "I couldn't sleep and I had to work off some of the stress"  
"It's okay, it's okay," Olivia stated placating. "We're just trying to make sure that we have all the details. I'm sorry I just wanted to know what time you left your apartment."

Katrina relaxed slightly now that she felt the Detectives weren't trying to blame her. "Yeah. I left around two or two-fifteen in the morning. Central Park is about five blocks from here. Not that far. I just started walking trying to get everything out of my system. I just got to the park when someone hit me with something." Katrina gestured to the right side of her face which was covered in a colorful array of purple bruises.

"He came up behind me I didn't even see him." She continued in a shaky voice. "Next thing I knew he had dragged me into the bushes and he… he… " she broke into a sob and bolted from the room.

Olivia glanced at her partner who had been silent thus far simply taking notes and trying to let the victim remain at ease. He returned her look with a shrug.

"Are you all right Ms. Meyer?" Olivia asked as their interviewee slunk back into the room and once again pulled herself up into the chair she had been perched on.

Katrina nodded and self consciously wiped at her mouth with the sleeve of her sweatshirt. "Umm… the medicine they have me on. It… umm… it makes me sick sometimes. I'm sorry."

Elliot nodded in sympathy. He'd had a similar experience with the cocktail of drugs when he'd been exposed to HIV trying to save a young woman from committing suicide. "There's nothing to be sorry for." He intoned soothingly. "Those drugs can really mess up your system. It'll get better."

Katrina Meyer looked directly into his eyes. Anger forming behind the light green irises. "Will it? Will you find the man that did this to me? Will it fix the fact that he violated me? That he exposed me to this virus?" she practically spat the last word.

Elliot tried to remain calm in the face of her onslaught. "Miss Meyer all I can tell you is that we are going to try our hardest to find the man that did this to you. Now is there anything else you can recall about him? Anything at all? Voice, aftershave?"

"No. Nothing. He didn't speak. It was to dark too see and I was to afraid to breathe. Now if there isn't anything else?"

Olivia cut in. "No. Here's my card. If you need anything or remember anything else give me a call. My office and cell phone numbers are on there." She handed the card in question over.

Olivia and Elliot walked out of the apartment with the click of the deadbolt sliding into place chasing them into the hall.

Elliot sighed. One down three more to talk to.


	3. Chapter 3

**Tuesday March 15, 2005  
8:12 AM  
SVU Squad Room**

"Here's what we've got." The familiar clear map of the city was rolled out into the middle of the squad room as Elliot started to speak. Pictures of the four victims were taped to it. Circled on the map were the home addresses of the victims and the locations they were attacked. "All four of the victims were attacked in Central Park. There is no obvious connection to the victims. Katrina and Emily lived near the Park but Dominique was from Soho and Rachel was from the Village." Elliot sequentially pointed to the locations of the yellow dots on the map. "Two of the victims were White, one was Black and one was Asian. He seems to be an equal opportunity asshole."

Olivia stepped up to the board at this point. "From interviewing all of the victims we know none of them saw their attacker. All of them were hit from behind by some sort of blunt object on the right side of the head which indicates a right handed attacker. None of them noticed anyone around. So our list of potential witnesses is zero. We've got a couple of uniforms asking around so we might get lucky."

Elliot stepped back in. "They all reported a similar experience once they were struck on the head," he said and paused to flip through his notebook, "they were dragged from the path where they were walking and into the bushes where he forced himself on the woman from behind. None of the vics got a good look. No one remembers any details. No smell, no clothing, no voice. He didn't talk to any of them."

The tag team breakdown continued as Olivia stepped back up to the map contemplating the red locations which denoted the attacks. "The attacks didn't occur in any specific part of the Park. So two options. He's marked the whole Park as his 'hunting ground' or this is his comfort zone. Either he's coming to the Park and specifically waiting for women alone late at night or he lives close."

Elliot sighed from where he perched himself on the edge of his desk. "Which pretty much leaves us back where we started. With four girls who are worried sick and puking their guts out because some prick with HIV decided to go out to Central Park and rape them. Meanwhile we've go no real leads and we're sitting here twiddling our thumbs waiting for another victim."

Olivia frowned at her partner. "We're not doing nothing. We've got people out canvassing the streets and we've collected some solid information. I think we should take this to the media. Get word out so that women aren't walking around by themselves.

"No media." Cragen took the chance to step in. "With no leads and no picture of the perp we'd be buried in phone calls and with no description we wouldn't be able to weed the good from the bogus."

"These women need to know they're in danger. Hiding this type of information isn't going to help anyone. It just ensures that some scared woman who thinks she is the only one this has happened to isn't going to come forward." Munch had decided to put his two cents in.

Cragen pulled rank, "And burying our detectives in false statements isn't going to help either. No. We need to focus on what we have and see what we can come up with."

The impromptu meeting broke up at that point as all four detectives and their Captain returned to their respective desks. Elliot leaned back in his chair as he furiously chewed on the end of a pen. "So what now? Recanvass? I don't think we should talk to the victims. We got all the information we could from them and they were all pretty upset by us being there."

"I agree." His partner's voice floated across the adjoining desks. "I don't know. Let's go back over the facts…"

**Tuesday March 15, 2005  
9:37 PM  
SVU Squad Room**

"Ugh. I'm toast. We've been at this for more than twelve hours and still nothing. This is so frustrating." Olivia slapped the case file back on her desk. "There aren't any leads. Maybe we should call it a night and look at it fresh in the morning."

Elliot nodded absentmindedly. "Yeah. I'll leave in a few."

"Elliot everyone else has gone home. Go home. Eat some food, get some sleep and we'll pick this back up tomorrow. We're not doing the victims any good running ourselves into a wall."

"Yeah. Go home. I'll leave in a few. I promise"


	4. Chapter 4

**Wednesday March 16, 2005  
2:13 AM  
SVU Squad Room**

The phone jerked Elliot awake from where his head was resting on his desk. He glanced around blearily until he found the object of his desire and picked up the receiver.

The news on the other end brought him to full attention. Another victim. Same MO but this one had gotten a piece of the guy. Elliot thanked the Officer on the other end and grabbed his coat after making sure to scribble down the pertinent information.

**Wednesday March 16, 2005  
2:24 AM  
Hospital**

Elliot clicked his phone shut as he entered the room of the latest victim. Olivia would be there in twenty minutes but in the mean time he need to vouch for the rape kit and try and calm the terrified girl down.

As he looked at the person sitting on the hospital bench there was a tightening in his chest. The right side of her face was covered in a motley of dark purple and deep blue bruising which culminated in an eye swollen nearly shut. She looked small and lost surrounded by a hospital gown that seemed to be two sizes to big.

Elliot glanced down at his notes which stated her date of birth as July 5, 1985. Nineteen years old. Just a kid. He sighed and in a soft voice announced himself. "Hi Anna. My name is Elliot Stabler. I'm a Detective for NYPD. I'm going to be asking you a few questions."

Despite the soothing tones of his voice she jumped. Pausing halfway between the door and the exam table she was sitting on Elliot waited as her breathing slowed and she looked at him before he got any closer.

"Look. The doctor is going to come in and perform a rape kit. They're going to take some samples and examine you."

She responded with a slight tremble in her voice. "Is it going to hurt?"

"It's going to be a little uncomfortable but if you want I can sit here with you. You can hold my hand if you want and if anything hurts you can just squeeze it."

Anna silently nodded her assent and Elliot slid a chair up to the side of the table and put his hand out. Tentatively she returned the gesture and placed her hand in his larger one. Her small smile seemed to light her face despite the ugly discoloration. It disappeared a minute later and her hand tightened when the door opened revealing a tall thin female doctor. The doctor smiled and entered clipboard in hand.

"Hi Anna, my name is Meredith Frasier. I'm going to be examining you. If you want I can explain the whole procedure for you so you know what's going to happen."

The frightened girl on the table took another tremulous breath and nodded squeezing Elliot's hand. He silently squeezed back in a gesture of reassurance.

**Wednesday March 16, 2005  
3:24 AM  
Hospital**

Elliot had just returned to Anna's room after vouching for the rape kit. A bottle of orange juice in hand he was trailed by his partner who had arrived during the examination but felt it would be better to let them finish before going in.

"Hey Anna," Elliot smiled at the girl who was now sitting with her knees to her chest and pushed all the way up against the wall. "This is my partner Olivia Benson." He handed her the juice as Olivia smiled from over his shoulder.

"Hi Anna," Olivia smiled at the teenager.

"Hi." She took the proffered drink and opened the top and took a tentative sip.

"Anna," Elliot started in a soft calm voice, "I know that what you went through was pretty awful but we think that if you're willing to help maybe it will help us catch the guy. So I'm going to ask if you want to help us by telling us what happened last night."

Anna who had been staring intently at the bottle clenched in her white-knuckled hands flicked her eyes up to Elliot's and swallowed. She opened her mouth to start talking but it clicked shut just as quickly and her head dropped to her knees. Her shoulders began to shake.

With her head down on her knees all he could see were her bruised arms wrapped around her knees and her dark blonde hair. His chest hitched as he thought of his oldest daughter and his immediate reaction was to comfort her.

Sitting on the edge he tentatively placed his left hand on her shoulder not sure what her reaction would be. Anna jumped and fear flashed through her dark brown eyes for a minute.

Suddenly, though Elliot had an armful of sobbing teenager. Her arms wrapped around him in a death grip she sobbed on his shoulder as he rubbed soothing circles on her back. Olivia slowly took the time to back out of the room.

Twenty minutes later Elliot emerged from the room. Dark circles rimmed his eyes but the burning hatred behind them almost caused Olivia to take a step back. He was pissed.

"El…" she started.

"He raped her Liv. She's NINETEEN and he raped her. He came up behind her and hit her with a rock and when he thought she was helpless and couldn't do anything he dragged her off the path and raped her. She wasn't helpless Liv. She said she cut him up a good one. The kit found skin and hair under her fingernails. She saw his face. We're going to nail this bastard to the wall."

"How is she now?"

Elliot shook his head. "Asleep. God Liv she's so young. She's Maureen's age."

"No. Don't go there Elliot."

"It could have been Maureen." He collapsed into the orange hard plastic chair against the wall. "She goes to NYU. Anna does. This is so fucked up." Elliot pressed the heels of his hands to his eyes as if he could get the images out of his head by sheer force of will. "She doesn't know. We still need the DNA to confirm this is the same guy as the other attacks. But she doesn't know. I couldn't tell her."

"Doesn't know what?"

"She doesn't know that if this is the same guy that he has HIV. She could have HIV Liv and I couldn't tell her. I couldn't. How do I tell her Liv? She's nineteen. How do I tell her that this isn't even the worst?"


	5. Chapter 5

**Wednesday March 16, 2005  
4:55 AM  
Hospital**

Elliot looked up from his hands as a couple breezed past. The woman's hands were clenched together and one of the man's arms was wrapped around her shoulders. Elliot's eyes tracked them through the glass as the woman detached herself from her husband and slipped into the chair by Anna's bedside.

Elliot watched entranced for a few minutes as the father began to pace. He saw Anna roll over on her side to face her mother. Immediately her mother engulfed her in a hug and once again Anna's frame started shaking as she released her pent up emotions.

He could see as her mother softly stroked the side of Anna's face which wasn't marred by bruising and whisper soft words into her ear. Elliot smiled softly at the love radiating between the two women and the unconditional support of her mother.

Just then the scene was broken by a yell from the father. "WHY?" Elliot's eyes snapped to the pacing man. "Why the FUCK were you out last night? What were you doing in Central Park at one forty five in the morning. What were you out selling yourself on a corner or something?!"

The last comment was Elliot's breaking point. He stood up and entered the room as his shocked partner followed him. Sparing a glance for Anna and her mother who had both seemed to shrink before the onslaught Elliot easily slid between the hospital bed and the pacing man.

"Mr. Doulin I'm detective Stabler and I've been handling your daughter's case. I think it would be best if you would calm down."

"My name isn't Doulin."

"Sir your daughter's last name is…"

Elliot was cut off again. "You think that WHORE is my daughter. Never in a million years. Bowman. My last name is Bowman."

"Mr. Bowman. I think it would be best if you keep your voice down and step outside with me." Elliot breathed deep in through his nose. "Anna's been through enough tonight and I don't think that she needs you screaming at her and I know she doesn't need you screaming the things you've been yelling."

"Fuck off."

Before he knew it Mr. Bowman had been spun around and his wrist was being held in a firm grip. His arm was wrenched up behind his back. Another hand was quickly placed on the back of his neck and he was in the hallway before he had time to protest.

Spinning on his captor as soon as he was released Elliot ducked the swing and stepped into the man's face. "Sir. I'm going to ask you to wait out here. I swear to God that if you touch one hair on that girl's head you will be more sorry than you will ever know. She has been through an amazing amount of pain tonight and the last thing she needs is an asshole like you telling her what you just said. Do you understand me?"

Mr. Bowman nodded.

"Now I suggest you plant yourself on that chair and wait until your wife comes out." Elliot turned to re-enter the room and suddenly there was a shooting pain at the back of his head. He staggered two steps and turned on his assailant. Trying to repeat the earlier maneuver of ducking as another punch came sailing towards his head Elliot was too slow and pain exploded from his nose.

Then Olivia was there. Mr. Bowman was up against the wall and in handcuffs. Elliot slid into the hard plastic chair and cradled his bloody nose and sore cheek. He only vaguely heard Olivia reading Bowman his rights and charges: assault on a police officer.

A nurse who had seen everything slipped into the chair next to Elliot and pressed an ice pack to the back of his head. He hissed as the cold bag touched the inflamed skin. Sterile pads were placed into his hands as he cleaned up his nose and leaned back into the chair.

Olivia was back squatting to get eye level with her partner. "El?" No response, "El, I handed the guy off to a uni. He was here getting someone's statement after a fender bender and said he'd take the guy in. El are you okay?"

The man in question closed his eyes and nodded. "It's just been a really long day."


	6. Chapter 6

**Wednesday March 16, 2005  
7:30 AM  
SVU Squad Room **

Capitan Cragen looked at two of his top detectives. Olivia Benson and Elliot Stabler had just arrived from the hospital. Olivia had informed him of what had happened at the hospital. The step-father of the victim was down at another precinct being interviewed on the assault charges. Elliot and Olivia had given their statements to the uniforms at the hospital.

The victim, Anna Doulin, was still at the hospital and would be released later today. She was under sedation due to the stress caused by the situation with her step-father. Her mother was there looking over her.

Olivia's concerned eyes were turned to her partner. Sympathy shone but it was unnoticed by her partner. Elliot cradled his head in is left hand and was looking blankly down at the paper in front of him.

"El, why don't you go upstairs and sleep in the crib for a few?"

He looked up at the sound of his name and gingerly shook his aching head. "No. Liv we have to find this guy."

"Look we don't even know for sure if it's the same guy. The DNA tests aren't back."

"I know Liv. I'm sure of it. I don't need DNA samples to tell me that this sicko raped this girl and I sure as shit don't need DNA samples to tell me he's going to do it again. What I need is to find this guy so he doesn't do it again."

"You're not going to find him when you can't think straight because you're running on an hour sleep and you've just had your head smashed up by one of the victim's step-father. Get some sleep Elliot."

Before Elliot could protest Cragen stepped in. "Go up and catch a couple of hours Elliot. Listen to your partner." He sucked in a breath as the detective in question turned to face him. There was still a faint rust smear under his nose where the blood hadn't been cleaned up. A bruise had started to show as a smudge under his right eye. The thing that shocked Cragen were Elliot's eyes. There wasn't any life in them. The glint of amusement after liberating a doughnut from Fin's desk without the other detective noticing, the fire of anger when someone hurt a child none of it was there. "Sleep Elliot."

Elliot merely nodded and trudged towards the crib.

"Benson," She looked up at her Captain, "Check on him in an hour or so." Don sighed and turned back to his office. SVU was a hard place to work he hoped that Elliot's determination would survive this case.

**Wednesday March 16, 2005  
8:30 AM  
SVU Crib**

Olivia dutifully entered the darkened room exactly an hour after Elliot had left his desk. She was worried about him. This case had really been getting beneath his skin. The comment about Maureen had really scared her. As soon as her partner started seeing his kids in every case she knew he would burn out.

She looked over at the man in question. Sprawled out on one of the bunks his right arm hung over the side and she could see his socks peeking out from beneath the thin police issue blanket. He looked like a little kid all sprawled out like that.

"Liv?" The groggy voice floated to her.

"Yeah El." She moved to sit on the bunk across from her partner putting herself directly in his line of sight. "How are you feeling?" She looked directly into his eyes trying to read if he was holding back from her.

"Tired. I'm just tired Liv. Give me another hour and we'll catch the bastard."

"Yeah." There was a lie in his eyes. She shook her head sadly and hoped that this wouldn't be the case that put a hold on Elliot's SVU career.


	7. Chapter 7

**Wednesday March 16, 2005  
10:30 AM  
SVU Squad Room**

Elliot walked toward his desk still feeling groggy. He rubbed his hand across his face and hissed in pain when it passed over his bruised nose. Sighing he slumped into his desk and pulled the Doulin file closer.

Flipping open the manila cover he was immediately confronted by the photos of Anna's bruising taken during the rape kit. He passed those and looked at the medical report and pulled out the police report. This was good. Dry. No pictures, he could pretend the words on the page didn't mean that a teenage girl wouldn't ever be the same. He could pretend there wasn't a victim associated with the black ink scrawled across the page.

He sighed again.

Olivia slid into her chair and looked at her partner. He looked just as tired as he had three hours ago. Taking a deep breath she got ready to dive back into the case. She tossed a note pad over the desk. It plopped right down on Elliot's file causing him to start. "Slow reflexes Stabler." She grinned and tried to bring the situation back towards the norm.

"Jeeze Liv. Scare a guy will ya?" But a wan smile crossed his face despite the irritated comment. He pulled the notepad around so it faced him and began to look over the notes. It was a profile of the offender. "Did you write this up?"

"Huang dropped by and put this together."

He nodded and went back to looking over this list. Caucasian, Male, late teens to early twenties. That surprised Elliot. He would have thought it was someone older. Scanning the list he also saw average height with a remark that it was based on the bruising patterns of the victims. Another key note was that he was probably a intravenous drug user likely accounting for how he acquired HIV.

He turned to the detective across the aisle. "Hey Fin, do you think you still know enough of the street dealers to try and put out a description."

"I saw the profile. There isn't anything special about this guy. Half the drug users in the city are white guys 19-24. No one's going to fink someone out if they aren't sure and if they do it's probably just because they think they can get something out of it."

"What about the fact that he's got scratches on his face that weren't there yesterday. Plus Anna said she got a look at the guy. Dark hair, couldn't see his eyes but she said she'd try to work with one of the sketch artists. Plus the rape kit pulled some skin from under her nails once the DNA is back we'll know for sure if this is the same guy and be able to match it up to any suspect."

"A'ight. You get me a sketch and I'll see what I can do as far as going through his dealer. Hell the dealer will probably want to know one of his customers is infected."

**Friday March 18, 2005  
9:30 AM  
SVU Squad Room **

Elliot was ready to bang his head against a wall. Two days. Two days and still nothing. Fin's search through the back alleys of Manhattan didn't turn anything up and as the time from Anna's attack lengthened the less likely they were to find the guy.

Armed with the sketch drawn up by the police sketch artist Creagen had decided to release the drawing yesterday with a warning about being alone in Central Park. The result was the detectives of Manhattan SVU were swamped with calls on leads they couldn't afford to pass up but which all ended up right back where they started.

The DNA results had been returned and Anna's attacker was, in fact, the same man that had attacked the other women in Central Park.

He grabbed his cell phone as a shrill sound rang out from the device. "Detective Stabler."

"He made bail." The voice on the other end of the line was sobbing.

"Shit. Anna, where are you? Are you at home?"

"I'm in my room," Elliot could hear pounding on the other end of the line. "he's trying to come in my room. My mom was in the kitchen. She told me to lock myself in here. I can't hear her anymore." Another gut wrenching sob.

"Anna. Anna listen to me. I need you to take a deep breath. I'm not going to hang up the phone but I need to make another call. One minute. One minute I'm going to hand the phone to Olivia. You remember her from the hospital?" Olivia had looked up at her partner the minute he swore. Something was wrong and when her eyes locked onto his she could feel the pain tearing him up.

She came around to his side of the desk and he handed the phone to her. "Hey honey. We're going to be sending some officers over to your house and detective Stabler and I are going to get there as fast as we can. I need you to push something in front of the door. Something, anything heavy okay. A chair…"

Elliot blocked her out as he made a quick call to dispatch which sent the closest uniformed officers over to the Bowman house. He warned them the man inside was trying to assault his stepdaughter and that he was on bail for assaulting a police officer.

Hanging up the phone he got his cell back from Olivia as he gathered his coat and tossed the squad car keys to his partner. For her part Benson had quickly informed their Captain of what was going on and had hurried out the door after her partner.

"Anna. I need you to stay calm. I know you're scared but there are people on their way to help you. They're going to get there as fast as they can." The sobbing on the other end continued as he slid into the passenger seat. Olivia turned on the portable light and they hurried through the busy streets of New York praying that the door protecting the girl would hold.


	8. Chapter 8

**Friday March 18, 2005  
9:40 AM  
Bowman/Doulin Residenc**

It took ten minutes for Elliot Stabler and Olivia Benson to reach the semi-upscale apartment building where John Bowman was trying to break down the door to his stepdaughter's room.

Five minutes after the duo had left the station house they had gotten a radio call from the officers on scene. They had subdued the man and found Anna's mother unconscious in the kitchen where she had apparently been hit in the head with the thick porcelain lid from the top of a jar. The paramedics were taking her to the hospital but the officers said that Anna wouldn't come out of her room.

Elliot already knew that. He had heard through the phone while the officers accosted her stepfather and called an ambulance from the other side of her door. He tried to calm her and tell her that her mother would be okay. After he got the radio that she was being taken to the hospital he passed the information on to Anna. The head injury looked like a concussion and Mrs. Bowman had woken up in the ambulance and asked after her daughter.

Now Elliot was surrounded by the evidence of the violence. He could see into the kitchen where painted chunks of porcelain lay scattered on the floor and the gruesome smears of blood where John Bowman had apparently beaten his knuckles bloody against Anna's door.

He clicked his cell phone shut and slid it into his pocket as he laid his hand against the door. "Anna?"

Muffled sniffling could be heard through the wood. "Detective Stabler?"

"Hey, Anna. Could you open the door for me?"

"Yeah." The sound of something heavy being dragged across the floor and then the click as the lock opened and one brown eye appeared in the crack between the door and its frame. A sigh of relief passed Elliot's lips as the door was open more fully and he took in the sight of the trembling girl. The bruises were fading from the attack and no new ones had taken their place. At least Bowman hadn't gotten to her.

Suddenly he once again found his arms full of sobbing teenager. There was nothing he could say that would make the world right for her again. So he silently allowed her to lean on him while his left hand softly stroked her hair and his right rubbed soothing circles in her back.

Olivia Benson was always told she was the empathetic one. She took care of the victims while Elliot nabbed the perps. The scene before her though caused her to rethink the generally accepted roles. This is what Elliot must be like with his children. Calm, comforting a strong, silent shoulder to lean on. Someone who would protect them from the world.

This case though, it was tearing him up. His eyes were bright with unshed tears. Ones she was sure would never be allowed to fall. Shaking her head she moved into the other room to put a call into the precinct. There was no way that keeping all that bottled up was good for her partner. She would have to talk to him about it and getting Elliot Stabler to talk about anything that involved something approaching an emotion that wasn't anger was like having a conversation with a bird, the conversation was pretty much one way with the exception of a little squawking. It was also sure to end with a few ruffled feathers.

Moving further into the family room she flipped out her phone. Captain Creagen would want to be updated on the situation and they would need Casey to make sure the bastard of a step father wouldn't get out on bail again. And that if he did get out there would be a restraining order firmly in place to protect the family.


	9. Chapter 9

**Friday March 18, 2005  
11:10 AM  
SVU Squad Room**

Elliot rubbed a hand across his face as he descended the stairs to the squad room. "She's asleep."

Anna hadn't wanted to go to the hospital. She wanted to see her mother but the thought of returning to the same place she had been only a few days ago wasn't something she wanted to deal with. So an off duty police officer who owed Elliot a favor was waiting for Mrs. Bowman's CT results so he could make sure everything was okay and Elliot could relay any important information to Anna.

Still frustrated with the case and the apparent lack of leads Elliot slumped in his chair feeling totally drained.

**Friday March 18, 2005  
11:40 AM  
SVU Squad Room **

"Shit."

Everyone looked at Fin as he grabbed his jacket from the back of his chair and leapt from his seat barely letting the phone hit the cradle before he was halfway across the room. "I finally got a possible drop on the guy. One of my old informants from narcotics knows who he buys from."

Elliot was already out of his chair.

"Look it's not a definite ID but it's something."

"Look Liv. I'm going to go with Fin, could you check on Anna?" He was out the door without waiting for an answer. Olivia sighed and headed up the stairs to check on the girl.

The room was dark and lined with cots. Not the most comfortable sleeping arrangements but when you were tired enough it was all you needed. Apparently Anna was tired enough. Three beds from the door she was sound asleep curled up on her side. Olivia turned to leave and paused when she heard a muffled sound.

There it was again. What sounded like a whimper coming from Anna's direction. A nightmare. Wasn't it enough that this poor girl had to go through one of the most horrible experiences possible? Now she had to relive it again in her sleep.

Cautiously approaching the bed Olivia softly whispered to Anna. "Honey. Anna, wake up it's a dream. Come on. Wake up sweetie."

The teenager lying on the bed sucked in a deep breath and her eyes snapped open unfocused and wandering. Then slowly her brows furrowed and she focused on the person squatting by the head of the bed. "Olivia?"

"Yeah. I came up to check on you and you were having a nightmare. You want to talk about it?"

Anna pursed her lips and shook her head which caused a sigh to escape the detective's lips. Sometimes the hardest part was getting the victim to talk about the experience. The pain of reliving the event was traumatizing. However, sometimes it was the only way a victim learned to move on. If they ever managed to do that.

Anna shook her head. "Where's Elliot?"

"He's with Detective Tutola right now. Why don't you try and sleep again."

"Will you stay here until I fall asleep?"

Olivia nodded and rubbed her back gently. "Sure. Your mom should be coming in a couple of hours. They wanted to make sure she didn't have a concussion. The doctor said that she'll be fine though.

Anna pulled the sheets up to her chin and closed her eyes.

**Friday March 18, 2005  
1:11 PM  
Alley behind Ambros Irish Pub**

_An hour and a half of this shit. If we don't find the guy soon Elliot's going to kill him when we do._ Fin looked nervously at the man seething next to him.

The pair had gone to meet Fin's contact and while Elliot sat on a stoop across the street and watched the conversation Fin had been told another location could be found. Which had led to another dealer and some helpful information. Camm Lumley. The suspect's name. They also found out that he generally bought cocaine and on a rare occasion, like today, Phencyclidine called PCP or Angel Dust on the street.

Two dealers and three pubs later they were apparently getting closer to finding the guy. The bartender said he had gone out into the alley behind the bar not five minutes before. He had been muttering to himself and glaring around the room until the bartender had yelled at him at which point he stumbled out the back door.

Apparently in five minutes he hadn't gotten very far. Stumbling half way down the alley and partially leaning against the wall was a man who's average frame and shock of dyed blue-almost black hair matched the description given by Anna.

"Elliot," the man in question glanced over at his temporary partner. "You got to watch yourself around these guys. Angel dust sends these creeps into a tail spin. They go nuts." Elliot nodded his understanding and approached the guy from the left side as Fin walked up on his right.

"Hey Camm. How're you doing?" Calm was the best way to handle it and Fin's relaxed voice caused blurred eyes to blink in his direction.

A few more blinks then, "Who?"

"Hey man. I'm Fin. Mikey sent me." He hoped the use of the dealer's name would keep the guy calm.

Meanwhile from the other side Elliott examined him. He looked to be around 23 or 25 years old. From the left Elliott could see the trail of marks covering that side of his face. The surprising shock of freckles, red eyebrows, and pale skin all spoke of Irish decent.

"Mikey?" Still confused he glared at Fin.

Elliot still didn't know how everything changed. In under a second the perp went from bleary eyed nearly asleep to raging lunatic.

"WHAT THE FUCK DID HE TELL YOU!?" Swinging wildly at the black detective Lumley managed to get a few good hits in before Elliot pulled the guy off. Stumbling backward and searching the ground he threw half a brick at Elliot's head narrowly missing.

At this point Fin decided he'd had enough of the joker. "Camm Lumley you're under arrest for assaulting a police officer."

Apparently that didn't phase him and he began to go after Elliot again. Aiming for a non-lethal area Fin yelled again. "Lumley stop now or I'm going to shoot you."

Even this didn't reach the man's drug fogged brain. Scanning the ground he found a board and took a swing. Elliot jumped back out of the way of the nails protruding from the end of board but at the last minute the board changed trajectories. Instead of swiping through the air where Elliot's head had been the board lodged itself his thigh.

Fin aimed and pulled the trigger hitting Lumley in the arm just above the elbow. But PCP had originally been used as anesthesia in World War One and the perp didn't seem to be feeling the effects of the bullet now lodged in his arm.

"Argh." Fin watched as Elliot stumbled back as if in slow motion. The force of the fall caused the board to be ripped out of Camm's hand. Fin squeezed the trigger two more times taking the delirious man once in each leg just above the knee. This time Lumley went down and Fin reached for his radio.


	10. Chapter 10

**Friday March 18, 2005  
2:10 PM  
Hospital**

Olivia was sick of this particular hospital. She had been here more than she wanted to in the last few days and for the second time in that span it was her partner that was hurt.

Luckily Anna's mother had picked her up before they had gotten the call to come to the hospital. She had a feeling that Anna wouldn't be very happy if she knew the detective had been hurt.

As she approached the room her partner was in she could hear arguing.

"NO." That would be an irate Elliot Stabler.

"I just think it would be a good idea…" Hmm… unidentified female voice. Nurse maybe.

"Look Doc." Doctor then. "It's just this one case. It won't happen again."

"It looks like it's been going on for a while"

"Leave it alone. You can't say anything about it anyway."

"But if it affects your job…"

"It doesn't and it hasn't. End of case so just screw off." Elliot must be pretty pissed. He generally didn't yell at women like that.

"I'm within my rights to inform someone if you become a danger…" Olivia felt that this would be a good time to make her presence known.

She took in her partner's color and propped up bed and decided he would live. "Hey El." His head snapped around so fast she was surprised he didn't have whiplash. "What's up? Are you okay?"

The man in question glared at the woman standing near the head of the bed. "Yes. I'm fine. No stitches a few butterfly strips, a bandage and a tetanus shot in my ass."

"As well as crutches and a full regimen of HIV drugs."

"Fuck crutches I'm fine" Olivia was worried he didn't protest the HIV medication.

"We can argue that point later but I'm sure I'll win that argument." With that she strode out of the room in a way that made Olivia fairly confident that the petite doctor would, in fact, be able to browbeat her partner into the use of crutches.

"HIV Meds?"

He nodded markedly calmer now that the nurse had left the room. "They're running the guy's blood right now. He matched Anna's description to a tee though and if it's the same guy then I have to be on the meds. Fin shot him and I was more or less in his landing zone."

"Shit."

"It'll be fine Liv. He didn't land on my leg and chances that I'd get it from a small cut somewhere else are slim. Plus Fin got me out of there as soon as he could so the bastard did most of his bleeding on the ground."

Somehow Olivia's fears weren't totally assuaged by this brash attitude. "Are you sure you're okay?"

"Other than the fact that I'll be puking for the next month and that nurse is probably going to make me hobble around on crutches for the next week I'll be fine. I'm just tired. I want to go home and sleep."

"I'll find the doctor and see if we can get you out of here. I'll also see if the perp survived. If he did we're going to have to talk to Novak and bring Anna in for an ID."

"I hope to God the bastard is dead." The vehemence in her partner's voice took her aback and with a start she realized she agreed with him. Olivia left the room in search of the doctor.


	11. Chapter 11

**Monday March 21, 2005 8:03 AM  
SVU Squad Room**

A weekend of sleep had done the detective good. He felt better than he had since the case started. Slowly making his way to his desk he gingerly lowered himself into his chair stretching his leg out as far as it would go.

"You're a sorry sight," his partner smirked from across the desk looking at his still black and blue face as well as the crutches that were now propped up against his desk. "I see you lost the crutch argument."

Elliot's eyes narrowed. "Yes, but only because that woman is an evil sadistic…"

Just as Elliot was getting into a full blown rant he was interrupted by the Cregan. "Lumley is our guy." The detective's heads snapped around. "The DNA test just came back. He matches the DNA from all of the rape kits. This guy is going away for a long time."

Elliot smiled and turned to his desk and picked up the phone so he could give Anna the good news.

**Tuesday April 19, 2005 9:42 AM  
Trial Part 32**

Anna had been amazing throughout the entire trial. She had held her head up as she recounted the events that led her to the witness stand and identified Camm Lumley as her assiailnt. The case was open and shut.

The two detectives sitting behind the prosecution bench sighed their relief as the verdict was read. Guilty. It had only taken the jury 45 minutes to decide. The sentencing hearing was the following week.

Olivia and Elliot stood to leave in unison. Just outside the door they bumped into Anna with her mother's arm wrapped protectively around the teen.

"Anna." Elliot said with a genuine smile on his face. "You were amazing in there. I'm really proud of you."

A shy smile was sent back his way. "Thanks." Her breath hitched. "It's over right?"

"Yeah. It's over. Camm Lumley will be put away for the crimes he committed and you will be able to go back to school and put this behind you. It's going to be hard but you're a strong and amazing young woman." He stooped and looked her right in the eye. "You don't have to worry about him any longer."

She briefly hugged him and turned to leave with her mother.

"She looked so sad." He turned to Liv.

She nodded and replied, "they all do. She'll be fine though. I heard her step-father is being brought up on assault and battery charges for the stunt he pulled."

"Good riddance." The detectives turned on heel and strode out of the building.

**Thursday April 24, 2005 1:15 AM  
Stabler Residence**

Elliot rolled away from his wife's warm body and reached out a hand to grab his cell phone from his bedside table. The insistent ringing of the Scottish National Anthem (something Lizzy had done and refused to change) dragged him from his sleep.

"Stabler." He blearily rubbed the sleep from his eyes. However the sound on the other end of the line had him sitting up straight and pulling on pants and shoes before he had time to think. The girl on the other end of the phone was crying. "Hello."

"Detective Stabler?" The voice was muffeled between sobs.

"Anna." He searched his mind franticly for the source of the late night call. "Anna what's wrong? Did someone hurt you? Are you at home? I'm coming over."

"I'm going to think about it forever. I'm never going to be able to stop thinking about it. I just want to stop thinking about it." Her voice rose and soon she was practically screaming.

"You don't have to think about it anymore honey. It's over. He's in jail he won't be able to hurt you again."

Her voice took on a high pitched wailing sound just as Elliot reached his car door. "You don't understand! He's always there he's inside me all the time."

He backed out of the driveway speeding down residential roads ignoring stop signs and praying that his police plates on his car would keep him from getting pulled over. "What don't I understand?"

The sobs died down to sniffles. "It's been a month. It's been a month." She just kept repeating it like a mantra and suddenly it clicked for Elliot. It took a month between exposure to HIV and an accurate test.

"Anna, I'm coming over. This isn't all there is. Just talk to me."

"I'm sorry." The heartfelt cry went up and then Elliot couldn't hear anything out of his left ear because the sound of the gunshot had reverberated in the ear piece of his phone.


End file.
